Let's be honest, if you're my friend, how lucky are you? Maybe winning the lottery lucky or not stepping in dog shit lucky. I'll let you ponder that one. But if you're my friend, chances are, I have called you in the middle of the night and said, "If anyone asks, I was with you." If you have ever heard the following: Girrrrrl, we need to talk. You're not gonna believe this shit . I can't make this shit up. This pansy ass mother fu*ker. What the fu*k was I thinking? Yup, you're my friend. If you know that I like to call my dad Henry and that I love to have Saturday chisme sessions with him, you are definitely my friend. You are a super friend if you've heard me tell one of his stories or if I have shared a famous one-liner of his. You are a super elite friend, if he's offered you an "ice cold beer." If you needed help moving or you randomly asked if someone wanted to come help you paint and I volunteered, you are indeed m
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